Hanna Haziqah

2010-08-14T15:56:00.002+08:00

Random!

My all time favourite girls ♥ Happy Belated 16th Birthday to myself (;

Hanna Haziqah, you're finally sixteen.

You've been through a lot at only sixteen.

Please don't stress yourself out.

There are more to come in the coming years.

You still have a lot to explore out there.

More challenges are coming & you know you can face them.

Study hard!

Hehehe.

& Happy Belated 16th birthday to Choonweng, too!

To DeeShaRau ♥,

Thanks for always being there for me through it all, for the really great advices, for the shoulders for me to cry on, for cheering me up when I'm not in the mood, for helping me deal with Boy problems, for sticking up for me, for never failing to brighten up my day, for all the jokes, for the motivation & enouragement, & for everything else. Too much to be written. We've been through a lot together, both tough times & good times. I hope that we'd still be this close in the future, though we'll be going our seperate ways next year. Thanks for being the bestest friends I could ever ask for. The soft toy that Deeyana gave me, I'll talk to it whenever I'm feeling down. I'lltalk to it as if like I'm talking to you girls. Overall, thanks for everything. I thank God for giving me the chance to get to know you girls. Whatever it is, I want you girls to rememeber this one word, DeeShaNaRau ♥

To everyone else, thanks you for the presents & wishes. Whether you wish me through Facebook or text, I really appreciate it :D

Presents include The Last Song Book, suppeeeerrr big soft toy, Miley's Cant be Tamed CD, a mug ♥, a Parker pen with my name engraved on it, money, a set of necklace, earrings & a ring, flowers & everything else. They're all beautiful & I'll treasure them (:

2010-08-09T15:07:00.004+08:00

08.08.10

Shasha, Tadza, Rau, Fiqah, Fiqqy & Ziqah (:

Missing from picture, Diyana H, Diyanah Sec 3 & Sabrina ):

Yesterday, went to Raudhah's place at Yishun for her brother's engagement. Reached Yishun at around 12.30pm, I think. We ate for awhile, then went to the girls side which is at Khatib. Not that far from Rau's place. We carried the hantaran( I don't know what it's called :P) to and fro. After going to the girl's side, went back to Rau's place. Chill there & celebrated Rau's belated birthday. We set up the cake for her like as if it was our birthday :P

Cut the cake & ate until around almost Maghrib like that. Hhahaa! Seriously, we ate a lot -.-

Left the house around 7.15pm & took 169 back to Ang Mo Kio. Shasha & Fiqah dropped of at their stop while me & the guys at AMK interchange. Overall, we all had great time ;)

Pictures have been uploaded at facebook.

2010-08-01T19:53:00.001+08:00

Did you ever fall for someone you know you shouldn't?

Try hard to fight your feelings, but you just couldn't?

You fall deeper with each passing day,

But try to hide it in every possible way.

He's only a friend, and nothing else.

That's the lie you keeping telling yourself.

You keep on saying he's just a bud,

But deep inside, you're falling in love.

You get so giddy when you meet his eyes,

But keep reminding yourself it isn't right.

A simple glance turns into a stare,

But you pretned that you don't care.

It's "not right" for you two to be.

Is that why you hide it so no one can see?

But how long will you pretend?

Keep lying that he's just a friend?

Perhaps your feelings you can never show.

Perhaps it's "wrong" for him to know.

Your friendship can't be risked over this,

So being his girl is an impossible wish.

:'(

2010-07-24T11:07:00.003+08:00

School as per usual yesterday. Raudhah didn't turn up, though. Lotsa stuff happened, but I don't wish to explain it all here. Once school ended, everything became normal again. Went for POA remedial then met the rest at the canteen. Sat with the girls then Tadza came. They started planning for the Hari Raya outing already. Hahaha! After planning and agreed on the date, Tadza realised they were looking at 2011 calender -.- HAHAHAH!
Anyways, I would like to thank Deeyana, Shakinah & Sabrina for the stuff that you guys did yesterday. You know what it is :P
Left school & met Raudhah at usual place. Then went home for tuition.
Okay, I need to do some chores now. Then off to Bishan Library to meet Diyanah & Sabrina :)

Sometimes I'm lazy, I get bored, I get scared, I feel ignored, I feel
happy, I get silly, I choke on my own words. I make wishes, I have Dreams And I
still want to believe that anything can happen in this world, For an
ordinary girl. So give it everything or nothin' at all. Get back on your feet
when you stumble and fall A little luck can go a long way. So don't you
worry about what people say. Who knows when the wind may blow, for an ordinary
girl. I'm just an ordinary girl.

2010-07-22T10:19:00.002+08:00

Words can never describe how happy I was yesterday. I really hope things will get better, just Like what Shakinah told me. Oh, she told me based on real life experience :P

Anyways, no school for today due to E-learning. I can't access to my E-learning site. Shit -.-

Meeting Aisyah later. Finally get to meet her :D

Going to Nenek house before meeting Aisyah. She's sick :(

Somehow, I can't wait for Malay Oral next week. I can't wait for all the upcoming Malay remedials :) Hehehe :P

Raudhah, Shakinah, Diyana, Jess & all the other guys out there (you know who you are),
Let's make this year a memorable one. I want to remember this year. We'll never know whether we'll be seeing each other again, or not. Let's keep all out other emotions aside & just be happy.
I'm going to be there for you guys, no matter what happens.
If you want a comforting hug, I can give you one. You want a shoulder to cry on,
I'll be your shoulders. You want advices, I'll give you, even if you don't need
them. I'll share your pain, happiness, laughters. We've been through a lot
together, the sunny days & not forgetting the stormy ones. The most
beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without
growing apart ♥

2010-07-20T17:48:00.002+08:00

48 MORE DAYS TO N' LEVEL!

14 MORE DAYS TO PRELIMS!

23 MORE DAYS TO MY B'DAY :D

Quick Update!

Sorry for not updating that often. Been busy these past few days with studies & other stuff. Just to let y'all know that I won't be updating that often. As you can see, I have exactly 2 more weeks to my Prelims. Next week Monday, will be having Malay N' level Oral Examintions. After Prelims will be doing intensive revision on every subject. Must aim 19 points, then MAYBE will be going to Higher Nitec, instead if going Sec 5. Well, that's what Cikgu Ezreen said. If you're eligible for Sec 5, go Higher Nitec instead. If not eligible for Sec 5, then go ITE. Don't waste anymore time. I couldn't agree more. Nitec also have Nursing :) I've got tons of homework to be done, school + tuition -.-

This thought suddenly came into my mind. I just realised that I have only have few more months left with Shasha, Diyana & Asyraf. Everybody will be going their own ways. I don't even know if I'll be going to the same school with Raudhah or not in the future :'( Then what about the rest? Omg.

Tomorrow will be having Maths & Malay remedial, so confirm will end late -.- I'm tired of practicing for Malay Oral. I know it's to prepare us, but I'm sick of it. Never mind, Hanna. This week is the last time we'll practice, then everything will be over :)

Anyway, today Assembly was AWESOME. Went up the stage with Shasha, Asyraf & Adi. Damn funny I tell you. This is all Mr Ali's fault, for calling out my name :P

Gotta go now. Going to sleep for awhile, since I'm having a headache right now :(

Will be doing revision afterwards. Peace.

Take my hand and I'll plead into tears. I don't understand why you
can't take me with you.

2010-07-06T18:51:00.005+08:00

Update, Update, Update!

Okay, I'm going to update since Jassy ask me to :)

No school yesterday due to Youth Day. Met up with Raudhah & Shasha at usual place. Went to Jass house first to take her POA paper, then went to KFC for lunch. Shasha kecoh sia pat KFC :P
After lunch, went to talk crap under one of the void decks. Then around 3, met up with Raudhah's friends, Ina Ke'ai & Mimi. Really had fun talking with them :) Baru jumpe, tapi bobual macam dah brape lamer kenal gitu :P
Hang-out with them, then they went off. The three of us went to talk about some "stuff" at AMK hub Basement there. Oh, Rau treat me & Shasha Soya Bean :) Thanks beb!

Ina Ke'ai & Mimi in the pictures below :)

Today school as per normal. Had my N-Level Oral Examinations today. It was in the hall. At first, I was damn nervous. But then when it was my turn, whoa! Suddenly, I spoke confidently. As I was talking, Mr Ali was in my head. So, I also talk dramatically. Everything turned out to be awesome. So, now I'm not worried for Oral anymore. But, I'm worried about this one promise that I have to fulfill by tomorrow :(

2010-06-30T16:43:00.002+08:00

"if one day you realize that i have not been talking to you
in a while, it's not because i don't care anymore. it's because you pushed me
away & just left me there. you may not have
realised it, but i've been trying really hard to start talking to you. it's
alright, i understand. you don't want to give me hopes. don't worry, i'm not
putting anymore hopes on you at all. i see you as a friend now."

i've been feeling really tired these days. i guess it's due to my lack of sleep since i've been studying almost every night & i'll only go to bed past midnight *yawn*

school has been fine. more & more homework. remedials start next week & most of them will end around 5pm like that.

english 'n' level oral examination will be next week, 6 july. after that, malay 'n' level oral examinatins which will be on 26 july. super fast siol.

alright, i'm gonna take a nap for awhile before starting on my revision.

Zzzzzz -.-

anyway, anyone want come my house tomorrow or friday & study with me?

& i mean, ANYONE.

2010-06-28T19:15:00.003+08:00

First day of school wasn't that bad at all. Woke up feeling really excited ;)
Met the normal people at MRT, then head to school. Seriously, happy siol when we reached school :D
First period was form teacher period. I swear, I don't like the new time-table -.- very shitty.
Only the first day, I've got piles of homework to finish up. Malay, Maths, Social Studies, English.
Now, I'm not excited for school tomorrow -.-

do you know that your present is still with me?

i don't know what the hell am i waiting for.

i mean, why can't i just give it to you just like that?

why is it so hard for me?!

gosh, hanna, what is wrong with you?!

i know you already know about me buying you a gift.

sumpah, i don't know when to give you.

i bring your present everyday, but i don't have the guts to give you.

pandai kan? i tau -.-

haiyooo~

D':

2010-06-22T13:22:00.003+08:00

So why does your pride make you run and hide. Are you that afraid of me? But I know it's a lie what you're keeping inside. That is not how you want it to be.

If you think I'm fine, it ain't true. I really need you in my life.

No matter what I have to do, I will wait for you.

2010-06-17T18:27:00.005+08:00

I'm back (:

Been gone for quite sometime.

To some people who's still asking me whether I'm fine or not, yes I'm fine. Still on medication, but can manage. No worries (:

Can't believe that next week will be the last week of holidays. I'll be busy completing my holiday assignments. I don't know how to my Malay compo. Shit man -.- POA, quarter done. English, haven't started. I can't find the damn paper. Life's back to normal, I guess. Sometimes, the truth may hurt. But, you just gotta accept the fact and move on with your life. You just gotta believe that if something is meant to happen, it will happen. May not be now, but in the future. But if it still doesn't happen, it's just not meant to be yours. Something better might be awaiting you in the future. Just believe :)
Relationships might not last, but a friendship does. I believe.

"If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me."

I understand what's going on. I know we're just gonna stay as friends only, I'm okay with it.
Cause I'm thinking the same thing as you. I don't want to risk our friendship. I see you as a friend. I want us to be like how we used to when we were friends. I hope we can start all over again, & talk to each other like nothing happened. We're gonna take our N levels soon, & we might not know whether we will still meet each other or not in the future. I don't want to waste this little time left on something that's not worth it you know. I just miss us being friends, that's all :'(

2010-06-07T16:55:00.001+08:00

"If you wanna leave, you can. I’ll remember you, just like I remember everyone that leaves."

- Lilo and Stitch

2010-06-06T20:41:00.003+08:00

Flooded with all this pain,

knowing that I'll never hold ya, like I did

Before the Storm.

With every strike of lightning,

Comes a memory that lasts

♥

what hurts the most is

knowing that everything's

not going to be the same anymore.

2010-06-06T20:27:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY,

NORHAFIZAH :D

May all your wishes come true.

_________

things change, and so does people.

thanks to my girls for being there for me.

& for cheering me up.

you guys never fail to give me advices.

appreciate it loads.

Love ya.

but face it, it's my problem.

at the end of the day, it's me facing them.

i have to learn to face them myself.

independent.

get that straight, hanna.

2010-06-04T17:02:00.002+08:00

currently very pissed off right now.

mad, sad, disappointed, broken.

cb.

2010-06-03T19:24:00.002+08:00

HAPPY ADVANCE 14th BIRTHDAY,

SABRINA YO :D

You're a big girl now :)

May all your wishes come true on this special day.

Stay happy & smiley all the time.

Even though there are times when it was awkward between us,

but we manage to pull through :)

Hahas.

Whatever it is, you can still talk to me about anything alright?

I'll be always be there for you if you need anything.

I'm just a text away.

Love ya ♥

Btw, I love that picture up there :D

2010-06-02T14:12:00.003+08:00

Wassssuuuuupppppp :D:D:D

finally, holidays are here :)

but still need to attend school for remedial.

-.-

yesterday had malay & maths. didn't went for maths though :P

malay was okay luhh.

today malay was a little bit boring.
skipped geography.

went to mac for breakfast with fizah & raudhah.

around 11+, shakinah came with jess :)

talked, laughed, talked.

then like suddenly, a lot of ang moh's enter the mac.

all of them are teenagers.

then they sat at a table same row as us.

i swear, all of them are damn good-looking :D

one of them had the justin bieber looks.

shakinah happy siot!

then this one guy..

subahanallah, damn handsome+cute.

OMG, i tengok, i pun cair siol!

but then, they all eat so greedily. like there's no tomorrow.

but who cares! hahah!

anyway, we were talking abaout 14 june outing.

at first, wanted to make bbq, but cancelled.

then planning to go sentosa, but cancelled.

now, we're planning to go to haunted places.

but of course, go during the day time.

hahah! i don't dare go night time D:

LOL.

anyway, going night cycling tonight :D:D:D

can't wait.

but then, i scared tomorrow i can't wake up for remedial :(

i asked raudhah to morning call me at 7am. call until i pick up :)

I love you up to the point where I found myself constantly wishing that I won’t have to get over you ♥

2010-05-30T19:51:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 14TH BIRTHDAY,

NADRA IWANI :D

May all your wishes come true on this very day.

Semoga dipanjangkan umur dan dimurahkan rezeki.

Thanks for always being a pair of listening ears when we go home together

in the train.

Go find one good Ang Moh for yourself :P

Don't stress yourself out about boys.

You'll find the right one soon :)

You're like a sister to me.

Happy Birthday :)

2010-05-26T17:30:00.003+08:00

I just wish you knew how much it hurts inside, what it's done to me, and how i can't imagine ever feeling OK again.

I'm sorry.

Seriously, I am.

my attitude was bitchy today. do you think that i really want to act that way? of course not.

whatever it is, i'm sorry for acting that way and i know i shouldn't have. but i couldn't help it, that's all. okay, i'm sorry.

today was one of the worst days.

2010-05-25T20:46:00.002+08:00

i hate myself for having this fcuked up feeling towards you. i'm sorry :(

i know i shouldn't.

you used to captivate me. but now, everytime when i look at you, tears start to form behind my eyes.

i can't help it, but it hurts everytime i look at you & i don't know why.

what puzzled me the most is why do we like suddenly stopped talking in school?

sometimes, it's saddens me.

but i know, we're just maintaining "low-profile".

damn, i'm just pissed off with this "low-profile" thingy.

i wish we can just start talking like we used to before.

but i find it difficult. do you know that?

i can't do anything about it.

you looked happy and fine with eveything, so i'll just go with the flow.

i will be right here waiting.

i know, you're busy with your own stuff.

it's alright, i understand.

you do your thing, & i'll do mine.

but i'm afraid if you ....

never mind, i can't say it here.

just so you know,

millions of people would complete this world,

but i only need you to complete mine :)

2010-05-24T17:22:00.003+08:00

damn shit.

i'm damn worried for tomorrow's ptm.

i wonder if my mum remember that she has to come down to school tomorrow.

-.-

holidays are coming.

have to drill myself to study.

btw, i got my old tutor back & i'm damn happy :D

this time, no more playing. must study.

today had the emergency preparedness exercise in school.

it sucks big time can?

thought it was fun, but it turned out the opposite.

i want tomorrow to come quickly.

just get this ptm thing done and over with.

okay, my life's totally fcuked up right now.

everything i do doesn't seem to turn out right.

why can't i just be my normal self when i'm around you?

stupid me.

2010-05-23T12:38:00.002+08:00

dear mystery guy,
i should've have seen all these coming, but no, i was blinded by the "love". you make me laugh, you make me smile. & now you make me cry.
i guess it's my fault. i shouldn't have put too much hopes on you. i expected too much from you. & this is the result. i trusted myself to trust you. i believe that you were different from those guys out there who broke me a lot of times. but now, it seems like you're starting to show me that you're actually turning into one of them. or did you become like this because of me? i don't know.
you never gave me an answer. you heard from my friends that i like you. and above all, you've heard it from me, myself. but i've never heard it from you, but only from your friends. everyone kept saying that it will happen, but i don't believe them. in my point of view, no. i tried believing them, your friends, my friends. but it's just so hard.
maybe all this while, the feeling that i've been feeling is true after all. i shouldn't have trusted you that fast. shouldn't have put too much hopes on you. shouldn't have expected that much from you. you're no different from other guys.
thanks for once completing my life, and make me feel what it feels like to be with you for awhile. i really loved it and shall treasure it. i'm still waiting for an answer from you.
love,
h square :)

(if only you'd read this)

2010-05-23T12:34:00.002+08:00

Let me hold you for the last time,

It's the last chance to feel again,

But you broke me,

Now I can't feel anything.

When I love you,

It's so untrue,

& I can't even convince myself.

When i'm speaking it's the voice of someone else.

It tears me up.

I tried to hold on but it hurts too much.

I tried to forgive but it's not enough,

to make it all okay

:'(

2010-05-18T15:37:00.002+08:00

Wassup.

I feel so sick right now.

Anyway, school was boring just now.

Checked the mark sheet until 0830 in class, then went to the hall for CCA thingy.

Recess, then back to the hall for Ngee Ann Poly talk.

Then went for break, back to hall until around 1245 for NE talk, then dismissed.

Slacked around in the canteen until around 2.30pm, then went home.

Nothing much happened today.

But yesterday was one of the best days of my life.

I will never forget 170510 :P

LOL.

Tomorrow UDC. Now, I don't feel excited about it.

I'm having leg cramps, and so does my body.

& I don't know why.

Please pain, go away.

I want to play floorball tomorrow.

After UDC, probably going to watch The Last Song.

Wanted to watch yesterday, but I missed the 3pm show.

Damn.

Tomorrow, MUST WATCH.

-.-

Boy, I'll be waiting ♥

2010-05-16T20:13:00.001+08:00

From this video, it seems like Bieber has a slight crush on Cyrus :P

2010-05-16T19:56:00.000+08:00

Once we were a happy family

But now, it's tearing apart

:'(

2010-05-14T17:43:00.002+08:00

I'm a little happy today without a reason.

I'm happy everyday :D

Hmm, so far got back English, Physics, Biology, Maths paper 1 & Malay paper.

I passed English, Biology & Malay.

I failed Maths paper 1 (confirm paper 2 also fail -.-) & Physics.

Anyway, yesterday trip to ITE (Tampines) was awesome :D

Hahahah!

I swear, the guys there are like WOW :P

Tapi aku tetap SP1.

The courses there are all really interesting.

But, I think I will still want to go to Sec 5.

I can't wait for UDC, which is next week Wednesday.

Floorball, floorball, floorball.

I WANT TO WATCH "THE LAST SONG" WHICH HAD ALREADY BEEN RELEASED YESTERDAY.

Maybe watching it on Monday. I HAVE to watch it.

Ugh -.-

If we’re perfect for each other, and if we’re meant to be with each other, we will be with each other ♥

2010-05-14T17:40:00.001+08:00

Miley Cyrus & Justin Bieber Date night :) They're prolly just talking about some business stuff. But they look cute, though. Shakinah, jangan jealous :P

2010-05-12T16:37:00.002+08:00

there''ll be that time in life when you feel like just screaming at the top of your lungs, not bothering about the people around you.

sometimes, life is good, but sometimes, it's not.

i just feel like i'm losing hope already.

why can't everything be perfect for once?

i want to know what's in your mind right now.

will it happen or not?

are you just playing around, or are you serious?

or am i just being unreasonable, and freaking out for no reason?

the time that we spent yesterday was great, and i love every second of it.

okay, i think i'm just stressing myself out for no reason.

i need to stop thinking negatively.

i need to stop.

fml

2010-05-12T16:29:00.002+08:00

exams.are.finally.over

phew! i think my results won't be that good.

no hope for poa and maths. i don't think i did well for geography either.

english, bio, physics, malay and social studies was okay.

the rest? i don't think so.

tomorrow will be getting back the results.

i'm not really in the mood to get them.

anyways, at 1.15pm tomorrow, sec 4N will be going to tampines ite.

i can't wait for that, and i don't know why.

awesome.

can yesterday repeat again?

2010-05-05T20:29:00.001+08:00

Miley Cyrus- Can't Be Tamed

2010-04-30T17:41:00.002+08:00

Sup.

Okay, i'm like not in the mood to blog, but i feel like blogging -.-

Mid year has started.

2 papers down, 5 more to go.

English yesterday was manageable, but Malay today sucks big time.

Didn't know that the peribahasa would be that hard.

Everything's difficult, except the comprehension.

I receive the paper, I flip the page open, I look at Tadza, he look at me.

Our faces was like "WTF."

-.-

So yeah, had tuition just now.

After tuition, totally felt so fcuked up.

Whoa, lots of homework she gave me.

Looks like tomorrow cannot go out.

Hmmmmm..

Okay, there's another thing I'm thinking about, too.

-.-'

mystery guy.

you name yourself mystery guy.

2010-04-27T19:35:00.003+08:00

everything.sucks.today

yeah, even though i'm touched that you still remember what day today is,

but then, later part of the day, i found out something about you?

something that you did when we're together.

& i just found out about it now.

:'(

thanks, tadza for telling me.

2010-04-26T18:12:00.002+08:00

"If you think it’s time to let go, then just let go. There’s no point in looking back to what you have already lost."

270210

♥

& I wonder if you still remember what day tomorrow is.

:'(

Sometimes, you just gotta accept the fact that those bad boys who dump you, they're the one who gives you the best memories, even though they hurt you billions of times.

& it hurts, to keep thinking about them, but I just can't help it.

Honestly, I've been thinking about you for the past few days, & I know I shouldn't.

Remembering the times you made me smile, laugh, cry.

Remembering the touch of your hands intertwined with mine.

Remembering the touch of your lips.

Remembering the sound of your voice on the phone.

Remembering the times you always tease me.

& now, it's gone.

We don't talk anymore, & we just pass by each other awkwardly,

like as if we have never existed in each other's life before.

I wish we could be like last time, when we were still friends.

I miss talking with you.

I miss laughing to your jokes.

I miss the sound of your voice.

I miss seeing your crazy self.

I miss it when you teased me.

I miss us, being friends.

:'(

Though, this doesn't mean that I want you back. No, I don't.
This doesn't mean that I still love you. No, I don't.

You've moved on, & so do I.

You have your previous life back, & so do I.

You have your friends, I have mine.

I guess this is the way it's supposed to be.

But, I'll be thankful if we were to start all over again, and be friends.

Like we used to before.

2010-04-21T18:31:00.003+08:00

I'm feeling good today. Hmmm~

Have not been updating very often, & I'm sorry about that. Been busy with lots of stuff.

Mid-year examinations are coming up. Have been doing lots of revision lately.

School ended 1.45pm today, then straight away went for Maths remedial. It ended about 2.45pm, then slacked at canteen. Shakinah had to cook for her FNN, & I swear, it was delicious :D

Tak tau pulak bestie aku ni pandai masak :P

About 5+pm, left school and went to get new pair of contact lenses. Finally, I got it :)

Did the NAPFA 5 items today, & it was okay lah. Not that bad. The only fun part was when the guys had to do the pull-up. Damn funny, I tell you. Especially Bryan. Hahaha!

Standing broad jump aku tak pernah pass! D:

Oh, I just remembered that I skipped Social Studies mock paper today :P

Woke up late, that's why.

Okay, going to do my Maths homework now, & then revise :)

6 more days

2010-04-14T17:46:00.005+08:00

Lots of "awkward moments" today. Hmmm~

Feeling so fcked up right now.

No mood to blog.

2010-04-10T22:47:00.004+08:00

DEYI MILITARY BAND WAS AWESOME :D

Congrats for winning all the 3 awards for the second time

in a row!

You guys deserve it, & it was an awesome performance.

It was spelndid/beautiful/amazing!

& that's why I'm proud to call myself a Deyian :D

I'm gonna talk about today. Woke up at 10.30am, ate breakfast with Grandma. Left home at about 12.30pm, met up with Lisa & gang to clear up some important stuff, & mrt-ed to amk. Went to Indoor Stadium to watch the Military Band SYF with Shakinah, Deeyana, Diyanah, Hafizah, Nadra & Jesscca. All the band did awesome, but obviously, Deyi band was the best :D

Haikal did an amazing job with the maze(or however you spell it). Screamed at the top our lungs, & I'm loosing my voice right now. Deyi was the last item. Save the best for the last :)

All performances ended about 6+, then waited for the results. Everyone was damn nervous lah!

Best appearance: Gold with Honours, Deyi Secondary School

Best Drum Major: Haikal bin Rosli

Best display band: Deyi Secondary School

Everyone was cheering like hell, I swear! It was as if we were watching a soccer match, but actually it was a band performance. Met up with Raudhah & Sabrina and congratulate them, and went off. Everyone took bus 16 and dropped off at Dhoby Ghaut, & take the train. Me & Shakinah cabbed down to Bishan instead :P

Sent Shakinah at Bishan mrt, and went home. The moment I reached home, straight away I had my dinner since I didn't have proper breakfast and no lunch. Stomach was making weird noises at the stadium :(

Today was a great day, and I'm sure everyone's happy with the results. To the other schools who competing real hard just now, especially Tanjung Katong Sec, it's okay! Cheer up, there will always ba a next time. Try harder :P

I have a throbbing headache right now, my throat hurts, having leg cramps, & damn sleepy :(

2010-04-10T22:46:00.001+08:00

LEO AND LEO COMPATIBILITY:

With another Leo, it is a question of who is going to give up the spotlight. Two individuals born under Leo, when together, represent charm, entertainment and personality plus. But it could be too much of a good thing. To make the relationship succeed, each Leo must be willing to step back, to permit the other to show off special talents and abilities. The Leo man doesn't attract the usual, the mundane, and the ordinary. And to succeed in a relationship with Leo, you have to be somewhat eccentric, willing to forgo numerous conventions - and you have to dress well, appreciate good food and be heavy on the compliments. This man is romantic and somewhat egotistical. But much of the time he's worth an extra effort. No matter how exasperating he may be, he has a right to his ego because he is likely also to be proud of you. That's a key make him proud of you. Read, keep up with current events and maintain a sense of humor. He loves to see you laugh, as long as you are laughing with and not at him. The Leo man demands attention. He is fiery, romantic. He can be an easy victim of the green- eyed monster, too. Very jealous, offended, aloof - if he feels you regard him as anything less than the center of your universe. It's not easy. It's quite a job, handling the Leo man! The Leo man likes the theater but dislikes theatrics. The Leo male admires beauty but not the obvious kind; he prefers the subtle. He is repelled by women who use too much makeup by women who cry openly (it's much more effective to utilize a dramatic sob) by women who laugh too loud (better to squeeze his hand and smile in appreciation) and most important by women who steal the spotlight. He believes in equal rights for men and women, but expects you to accept the concept that he is just a little superior. He's affectionate and lovable-and he can be yours if you utilize loads of flattery and hat your eyelashes when he turns those magnetic eyes on you.

If you are pursuing a Leo woman, compliment her tell her she's beautiful and she will be. She has a flair for the dramatic. Let her have the spotlight: but also realize you will have to be unusual so don't tell all you know. Maintain an air of mystery. She loves to hear about herself, read her palm and check her horoscope. She demands that you be aware of her. A touch, a gesture, a secret signal something special - that's the way to woo and win the Leo lady. Your own manner should he regal. She wants to be with someone who is admired by others. In more intimate Moments, she admires tenderness, a caress; this is what she prefers to any heavy- handed overtures. She is sexy but she wants you to want her for more than physical reasons. She values herself She doesn't give herself away. That is, you must court her; thoughtful gifts mean more to her than the expensive variety. Plainly, romance is part of her life. She is romantic and needs to be needed. She is likely to be attractive, and she expects to be jealous of you, but doesn't want to be reprimanded for her own flirtatiousness. Make yourself a fascinating challenge. Involvement with a Leo woman can be fatiguing, but you will learn about life and living and love. Her nature is fiery; she is passionate, giving and generous. If you win her, the prize will be a great one. She is stubborn, but she is usually trying to work out what is best for you. Recognize her good qualities, which are numerous, in being amorous, avoid being coarse. Sex, for the Leo lady, is just one part of love. It is the rhythm of life but to be a part of her life you must first earn her admiration. She abhors the humdrum, routine, and stupid. She revels in the creative, in excitement, could be an addict of the theater and she will share the spotlight if she feels you really have something others would admire. She's unusual, complicated, and opinionated but she can be one of the most beautiful experiences in your life.

2010-04-08T17:49:00.003+08:00

Currently loving the life that I'm living now :)

Okay, I've decided to blog today since I've got nothing to do.
Today, for the first time, didn't study anything in class since all the teachers are absent. In the morning, my class need to be the "observer" or something like that for class 204. After that, free period all the way until school ends. Malay oral was postponed, AGAIN.
Dear God, thank you for giving me such wonderful people. They have never failed to brighten up my day, and support me. I wish I can tell them how much they mean to me. I dedicate this message to my best girls (you know who you are), friends & classmates :)

Life always lead me back to that guy

Since the first day, he's the only one who'd make

me feel happy

& that's what I love about him

I can't find a reason to not like him

I can't deny that I'm still in love with him

It has always been you

No one else

2010-04-06T19:29:00.004+08:00

e-learning today, which means no school. But tomorrow, back to school -.-
Went to Bugis & Vivo for double-date-but-turned-into-only-one-date with Shakinah, Achap & Syafiq. Everything was fine with boyf in the beginning, but turned upside down once we reached Bugis. Just to summarise up, today wasn't that good.
Sorry to Sh[A]chap for ruining your day.Takpe lah, krng lain hari boleh date lagi pe :P
Currently, waiting for "that" text message. Everything will change from tomorrow onwards, I promise.
:'(

2010-03-27T14:36:00.000+08:00

Miley Cyrus; When I look at you; Live on American Idol :)

2010-03-20T13:00:00.002+08:00

The seven things I hate about you

You're vain, your games

You're insecure

You love me, You like her

You make me laugh, You make me cry

I don't know which side to buy.

Your friends they're jerks

When you act like them, just know it hurts

I wanna be with the one I know.

i don't need you no more.

2010-03-17T09:36:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY, NURUL AMANINA!

You're 18, right? Hahahs! No matter how old you are,

you're still young on the inside :)

Chey, mcm paham gitu aku bobual :P

May all your wishes come true and hope that you have a great time on this very day.

Semoga Allah panjangkan umur and dimurahkan rezeki.

Amin.

Stay, happy & cheerful like you always do,

& Thanks for always being there for me and allow me to share my problems with you.

You're like my sister already.

Love you, sister :P
Nak present tak? Tunggu Hanna dapat gaji ehk?

hehehe..

2010-03-17T09:21:00.006+08:00

Awww~ They're so cute. But, I think it's a little too fast for them to make it so public.

_____________

It's 9:28am. Woke up superr early, as I can't sleep. Going out to cut my hair later, and then to Grandma's house, since my other cousins are there. I don't feel like going for Malay remedial tomorrow. I don't feel like going anywhere. Sighs..

I want my old life back. Not the life that I'm currently living.

you looked me in the eye and told me you loved me

were you just kidding?

cause it seems to me, this thing is breaking down

we almost never speak

i don't feel welcome anymore

baby what happened?

please tell me

cause one second it was perfect

and now your halfway out the door

2010-03-15T20:48:00.001+08:00

I need to know should I fight for our love for this long

It's getting harder to shield this pain in my heart

2010-03-12T21:33:00.002+08:00

i'm the one who worries/thinks about you, all the time.

i'm the one who would always give in for you, all the time.

i'm the one who would always be your listening ears, all the time.

i'm the one who would give up my free time just to entertain you, all the time.

i'm the one who would sacrifice my time with my friends just for you, all the time.

i'm the one who loves you, and accept you for who you are, no matter what bad things people say about you.

i'm the one who loves you for the sake of sincerity and love.

i'm the one.

no one else, but me.

have you ever realise that?

_________________________

cross country was damn tiring, i tell you. planned with girlfriends that we'd walk together at the back. but then, things didn't turn out like the way we planned. deeyana ran off first, followed by me, raudhah then lastly shakinah. hahas!

the whole even today wasn't that interesting, anyways.

currently, lots of things are in my mind. i have not slept in 3 days, only about 1 or 2 hours, then i'd stay awake till my alarm goes off. honestly speaking, i miss the times when i used to be in love with that particular boy, and no one else. sigh, times change, and so does people. it's sad that you gotta accept the fact that in life, things wouldn't turn out the way we want it to, but the way God wants it. but, you just have to keep believing and keep the faith strong, and who knows that the things that we always wished for really happened.

all i need to do now is chill (:

but unfortunately, i can't ):

2010-03-09T17:54:00.002+08:00

all i'm asking for is for you to be honest with me, that's all.

is that too much to ask for?

do i even mean anything to you?

i don't understand it now.

is it you, or is it me?

these tears mean nothing at all to you.

just for this once, i want to be happy.

but i just have a feeling, that's its coming to an end.

i'm prepared for it.

2010-03-08T20:32:00.000+08:00

One of her Best Looks (:

2010-03-08T20:14:00.002+08:00

I miss having girl to girl convo with my lovely besties up there.

Seriously, I'm sorry if I hadn't been spenting time with you lately.

Ever since I'm with him, I swear, I have this guilty feeling as I have not been

spending time with you guys that much. Especially, when we used to meet up

every morning, or when we walk back home together. I'm not around you guys anymore.

I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings.

Just to let you know, that whatever happens,

I'll still be there for you guys, and that I love you to the core!

Okay, I didn't sleep last night and I'm freaking tired right now, but I can't sleep :(

Anyways, met up Bby in the morning, and went to school as per normal. Lessons are boring these few days, but what to do. Still need to concentrate for the coming exams. Leave school at about 6.45pm, after MCC. Now, at home alone since Ibu just went out.

Wednesday, Grandma will be admitted to hospital to undergo an operation which will be on Thursday. I hope everything will go well. Prolly spending the weekends at the hospital.

2010-03-05T20:40:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY, NUR SHAKINAH BTE SUHAIMI:)

Semoga dipanjangkan umur, dan dimurahkan rezeki.

& cepat tinggi :P

May all your wishes come true.

Thanks for being a wonderful/great BFF to me, for always being there for me,

making me smile and laugh at your silly jokes.

We've been through a lot together, and we've made it this far together, with the rest.

This year would be our last year with each other, but it doesn't mean

that our friendship would end here.

No matter what, we'll be BFF for the rest of our life, insyaallah.

Love you, bestie.

HAPPY ADVANCE 1 YEAR TO SH[A]CHAP, TOO:D

Congrats!

2010-03-05T20:17:00.003+08:00

Finally, level camp is over. It was average, though. A lil' boring as we're stuck in the library from morning till evening. Yesterday's activity was the best. Everyone cried like hell, I swear. Hahahas! Today, camp ended at 9pm. Dinner at around 7pm, and went home with Bby after that. I didn't stay :) Anyways, I had a great time with lovely people around me, and especially with Bby.
Now, I have tons of homework to finish up :(

2010-02-27T11:42:00.002+08:00

Okay, I don't want to talk about yesterday's performance cause it's a bad one, but at least you guys did laugh along with us right? Hahaha!
Anyway, after performance, went to canteen and back to class for POA. After that, went back to the canteen, to watch the boys soccer match, but unfortunately it was postponed due to the heavy rain. I got asked by Sabrina yesterday. Her question was who would I choose between the Chinese one and the Malay one. My answer was, "I choose whoever that Deeyana approves of." Deeyana laughed real hard and then she went "Awwwww.." Btw, Dee chose the Malay one. I love you, Deeyana Binte Hashim!
So, slacked around until about almost 6, then went home with Deeyana, Raudhah, Hafizah, Sabrina,Nadra and Diyanah. I want to thank Hafizah for letting me walk with him, even for awhile only (:
Shakinah's birthday is next week. What should I get her?

my friends think i'm fool to think that you're the one for me

i guess i'm just a sucker for love

people try to tell but i still refuse to listen

cause they didn't get to spend time with you :)

2010-02-24T18:53:00.002+08:00

Hey, wassup :)
School has been okay, but not great. I keep getting sick these days, cause I can't find my medicine anywhere. Weird, isn't it? I swear, it cost me almost $80, and I "lost" it. Sighs.
I don't really know what to blog about.
I'm sad, angry, dissappointed at myself. How can I be stupid? Haishh :(
I'll just be patient. The time will come. It will.
Looking at Shakinah eating maggi just now, makes me crave for it. So, I'm gonna cook maggi for dinner. It's the only thing I can cook, since I'm alone at home.
Need to study for SS test tomorrow.

2010-02-21T19:15:00.002+08:00

i know you're not really happy with me

yeah, you said you're okay

but i know you're not

cause i didn't text you the way you wanted me to

but there's a reason to it

cause the more i use those words

the more i want you

i'm sorry, dear

2010-02-20T12:16:00.005+08:00

Finally, it's the weekends! I'm not looking forward to school these days.
Yesterday, was okay. School as per normal. I was planning to go home after remedial, but since I already promised someone that I'd watch him play his soccer match, I had to stay in school. Congrats, cause you did score :) sukerlah tu, kalau orang puji :P
So, watched the game with Raudhah and some random Sec 3 girl, while Deeyana was studying in the canteen. The table behind her was occupied with some Yishun Sec guys, and she felt awkward sitting there by herself. Hahaha, sorry beb! Few minutes after the second half of the game started, decided to go home. Walked, talked and laughed to the MRT with Deeyana & Raudhah.
Tons of chores that has to be done. Currently, doing the laundry now :(
I miss Shakinah sooooo badly :(
Thank God, she's coming back on Monday.
I swear, I've been having this indifferent feeling whenever you're around or whenever I'm texting you. Worst still, when we're in the same place. I don't know whether it's good, or bad but it's bothering me. Is it me, or is it you? I swear, I don't know :(

I love Deeyana.

I love Shakinah.

I love Raudhah.

& that's all I know.

2010-02-16T14:14:00.002+08:00

I'm boooorrrreeeddd. Woke up at 12pm, wash up, and ate maggi for breafkast+lunch. Stayed at home during the past weekend, yesterday and today. Break record already. Usually, I'm out and about during the weekends, but both my parents are working. Anyways, I "planned" to do my Malay homework, but I just found out that I've run out of foolscap papers. Stupid, right? Omg. I'm sooo lazy to do anything right now. Not really in the mood :(

glance at me

talk to me

laugh with me

be with me

2010-02-15T15:15:00.002+08:00

You know you need someone,

When the needs so strong,

When they're gone you don't know how to go on,

So the world is stuck in the moment,

Standing still until they come back,

You accept that they've got things to do,

But sometimes in the end,

There's nothing left for you,

If hurt is missing you baby,

I've done too much of it lately.

I can't eat, I can't sleep

What else could it be,

Missing you so deep,

Long as I'm where you're going to,

I'd wait forever and a day for you,

I wait up, wait up for you.

2010-02-15T14:45:00.002+08:00

Astrology Of Leo:
Leos do not want to be like everybody else, and take a lot of pride in being who they are. They love attention and strive for recognition and praise of others. Most Leos have a very strong character and are very independent; this allows them to be great leaders. A Lion is a very proud creature and never wants to be left in the background, he always wants to shine and be appreciated by others. Generosity and warm heartedness are some of Leo’s best features, which are pretty easy go get if the big cat it is shown some love and loyalty. When it comes to family, Leos are usually very responsible and protective. They will try to provide the best they can to their loved ones, however in return they will expect love and loyalty. On the negative side, Leos can sometime be bossy and over-proud, which will stop them from seeing things as they are and stubbornly insist on their own point of view. To tackle this situation, all you have to do is show your Leo friend some respect (and maybe love) and his/her warm heart will melt and start thinking rationally once again. People under this zodiac are usually quite materialistic. They like to live big and spend a lot. However at the same time they can be quite hard working, but they must see the benefits of such hard work. Most Leos have big dreams, however those dreams are nothing unless there is someone who will appreciate it. Though on the outside Leo individual might look strong and self-confident, on the inside he/she very much depends on affirmation, love and recognition of others. Many Leos like to perceive the world as if it revolves around them, however they often fail to recognize that it isn’t so, and that sometimes they are not part of the picture.

How to seduce Leo:

Laugh at their jokes
Be fun and entertaining
Wear expensive, branded items (huh?!)
Be honest and respectful

What you should not do, if you want a Leo person to like you:

Be disloyal
Lack of Confidence
Criticize them- NEVER do this to a Leo

Love traits:

Passionate lover
Very loyal, but also quite possessive. At times can be very jealous
Protective over their loved ones
Wants to be the leader in relationships
Loves with full heart and very caring ( Awww..)
Knows how to make their second half feel special
Leos are never cheap :)

Sex habits
With their natural charm Leos are really good in the free fuck department. They don’t even have to look that well. However, even when it gets to the bedroom level Leo will not let you down, because their fiery natures are just craving for some play and action. During the love making it is good to give the big cat a compliment, which will only stimulate them more. It is also a good idea to put a mirror or two, as it is a strong stimulus for Leos (and it is just fun in general, regardless of the zodiac sign).

Their typical after-sex phrase is - "Wasn't I fantastic?"

Drinking style
Leo likes to drink and dance - they're often fabulous dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity and turning kittenish. They generally know their limit, probably because they loathe losing self-control. When they get over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue - and perhaps not with the one what brought them. But Leo's not the type to break rules even when drunk, so just try to ignore it (try harder, Cancer) and expect a sheepish (and hung over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.

2010-02-12T19:15:00.005+08:00

Finally, it happened :D

& I'm proud of it.

In the morning, help out the CNY performers. Instructor didn't come, and I swear Deeyana was damn mad. Hahahas! Anyway, this year's CNY celebration is lil' boring. It's the same old thing we had last years. After school, thought oof going Mac, but it was damn packed. So , we went somewhere else. Lots of things happened today. But it was gooooodd.

I've been waiting like forever for "that" to happen. I wasn't sad, though. I'm happy *grins*

Honestly speaking, I don't like your girlfriend. Hahs! But you're "in love" with her. So, whatever. I don't give a damn about it -.-

4 days, no school :)

Have a nice holiday & take care, Shakinah & Shafiqah (:

Hoping that [S] will text me ♥

2010-02-08T20:39:00.004+08:00

& not forgetting, Raudhah (:

I am sooo tireddd!
Had MCC after school today. It was kinda fun :) After MCC, went Mac with Raudhah, while the others go to Banquet. Deeyana had to go off first, though. Went Grandma's house for a while to take some food, then home sweet home. It's sooo tiring. I can't wait for tomorrow's assembly. Hahahas! Tomorrow, I will probably be attending the CNY rehearsals. CNY performers please be in the hall by 2pm sharp. I want to talk to you guys first before the start of rehearsals.
Anyways, congrats to the soccer boys for winning today's match :)
aww.. bby scored (:

2010-02-03T18:34:00.005+08:00

i hate whatever feeling that i'm feeling right now

cause i know it's not right.

everything went perfectly, until..

it happened.

:'(

2010-02-01T20:05:00.001+08:00

Miley Cyrus at the Grammy's (:

Too tired to blog -.-
Zzzzz.

2010-01-30T14:18:00.002+08:00

Flag day with Shakinah was AWESOME:D
I really thought it was going to be a boring day, just asking for donations, but I was totally wrong. Met up with Shasha in the morning, then headed to school to collect the tins. Our first destination was Bishan. We got quite a huge some of money there. Bishan residents are all generous, that includes me :P
After spending some time at Bishan, we Mrt-ed down to Yishun. Hahaha! Sanggup sia. It's so crowded there, but the people are stingy. We did get some money, but most of them didn't want to donate. Worst still, when I asked them nicely, they ignored me. But the funny thing was, we were not suppose to go in the shopping mall. Shasha, being the clever one, went to this person and asked him if he wanted to donate some money. When he turned to face her, he was actually the security guard. And because of that, we were told to leave the mall. Thanks, Shakinah -.-
Mrt-ed back to AMK, went to eat and went back to school. Syafiq walked with us halfway, and he went somewhere else :)
Anyways, the both of us got our hearts broken a lot of times today. We got rejected :(
But, it was a great experience, but really tiring. My leg hurts again.

Shakinah:
"Would you like to donate? .... Thank you, Thank you. May God bless you."
=.='
Btw, the donation tin, it says "CCWA" (:
Going to sleep :)

2010-01-29T19:40:00.005+08:00

School was okay today. The moment school ends, that's when the fun begins :)
Nunu came down today, and it was a hell lot of fun! Slacked around with Raudhah, Shakinah, Deeyana, Rahmat, etc.. Too man people to be named. Watched a lil' bit of the soccer match between Whitley and, of course, Deyi. Hahaha! Okay, then talked nonsence all the way :)
Flag day tomorrow. Meeting Shakinah in the morning. Should I go to Bishan or should I just stay at AMK? I don't know. I'm sooo tired to do flag day, but nevermind (:
Going to shower now. I stink :(
bby cute today. hahas!
okay whatever -.-

Do you ever think of me, even if you love her? I really want to know.

2010-01-27T18:14:00.002+08:00

Today has been quite a great day. PE was freaking tiring that my legs are aching right now :(
Anyways, slacked a bit in school, did some Social Studies work, then laughed all the way with whoever was at the canteen just now. Met James at Junction 8, and walked back home. Thanks James, for accompanying me and yeah, great hairstyle. Btw, about that tattoo you just got, I still want to know who you're actually referring to :P
I've got lots of homework to complete, and have yet to submit my POA homework. Yikes. Will be studying the whole night tonight.
I feel like laughing right now, but I'm just too tired to laugh. Get it?
I don't want to go to this Saturday's flag day. I don't feel like going. I can't believe this, but I can't wait for remedials to start next week. Seriously, I can't.
:)

2010-01-21T16:40:00.000+08:00

"I'm a girl trying to hide my tears. I'm a friend trying to fake a smile. I'm a sister who wants to help. I'm a daughter trying to change the world. I'm the ex trying not to care. I'm just the girl who's trying to live her life."

i'm not suppose to love you.

2010-01-20T16:18:00.003+08:00

Mohammad Amirul Bin Ahmad

1990-2010

I'm gonna miss you, Abang :(

I'm sorry for everything.

May he rest in peace.

School has been okay, I guess. But the only weird thing is that, why am I communicating that much with him? It's weird, but I'm cool with it. Anyway, nothing much happened today. Just feeling very (100x) tired. PE today was fun-ny! Hahas. Social Studies test was okay. Manage to complete everything :)
Waited for Raudhah to finish her re-test after school today, then went back home. Suppeeerrrr tired, and I want to study. I'm so confused with myself these few days. I really want to hit my head real hard on the wall.
Probably meeting up with Lisa tomorrow.
To "niduf",
It's wrong for me to like you.
Cause my friends hate it when I say
that I like you back.
You're not a nice guy.
Everybody knows it, even me.
So, I'm gonna regard as a friend,
not more than that.

Just in case I'm not updating tomorrow,
Happy 2 months, Mat :)
I know you won't be reading this,
but on this day, I want to remember all the memories we shared
together.
211109 :D

2010-01-15T17:02:00.003+08:00

Dear God, please give Amirul the strength to make it through. He's a strong guy, I know.

Though I can't visit you, I'll be there for you and I'll pray for you. But, please hold on.

You're like a brother, father and bestfriend to me, I can't bear to lose that.

Please, stay strong, for me at least.

I can't think of anything else right now. I'm wondering, how am I going to face his family when I see them? But, the most important thing in my mind now is Amirul.

All I want to do now, is kill those Matreps. They hurt lots of people already. Me, Mat then now Amirul, who's fighting for his life. I hope that you guys enter jail and rot in there. You ruined everything.

I miss Mat :(

Though we're in two different world now,

you're still my Boyfriend.

Hanna Syg Mat (:

211109<3

2010-01-15T16:43:00.002+08:00

She was given the world

So much that she couldn't see

And she needed someone

To show her who she could be

And she tried to survive

Wearing her heart on her sleeve

But I needed you to believe

You had your dreams, I had mine

You had your fears, I was fine

It showed me what I couldn't find

When two different worlds collide

And she tried to survive

Living her life on her own

Always afraid of the throne

But you've given me strength to find hope

She was scared, unprepared

And lost in the dark, falling apart

This is what happens when two worlds collide

2010-01-13T19:34:00.002+08:00

Finally, I'm posting a proper blog post (:
I'm happy, but then someone just had to ruin everything.

Anyway, school was GREAT today. Lots of unexpected things happened. Good ones, not-so-good ones. I don't know, but I felt like I'm being social today. Talked to some people which I never thought I will, and that's crazy, if you understand what I'm tryin to say. After school, slacked at canteen, went Mac and head home. I swear, it's NOT safe for me to go out of the house by myself. But in the situation that's currently happening, I don't care if anything happens to me, cause there's other important stuff that's in my head right now. So, to the Matreps out there who's been trying so hard to find me, I surrender. Just do what you want :(
Sighs.

Just a lil' note:
In a relationship, both the guy and the girl have their own rights. No point if the girl keep standing up for the guy, until she lose all her rights. Be with someone who's willing to share his/her love with you. The one that's worthy is the one who doesn't make you cry. You have to be prepared to handle all this if you want to be in a relationship. It's not fair if the guy keep controlling the girl, but then that guy can do whatever he wants, including texting he's ex-girlfriend. In times like this, the girl has to fight back. So, please. She has cooperated with you, but why can't you? Think about it, okay? If not, I swear you're making a huge mistake, my friend.

A note to NIDUF (try guessing who i'm talking about :P ) :
I'm not jealous of you. Why would I be? It has been two years, okay. I don't feel anything towards you anymore. So, no point in trying to make me jealous of "purposely" walking in front of me with your hands intertwined with her. I can't be bothered with it, and it's annoying =.="

2010-01-12T18:14:00.002+08:00

1095 days has passed (:

ku masih setia menunggu

setia menanti..

2010-01-09T18:16:00.000+08:00

2010-01-06T17:38:00.002+08:00

I can't face you, that's all.

Whenever I do, it hurts. But I was just faking a smile,

so you won't see the sadness in me.

But if it makes you happy, then I'm okay with it, I guess.

It's life anyway. Whatever happens,

life still has to go on.

Even if it's killing you on the inside.

I believe that in love, I have to accept the fact that

what makes the person I cared about happy,

might on the other hand leave me lonely.

I thought I was ready to face all this.

But I guess, everything was just happening too fast.

Sometimes I wonder, why does this always happen to me?

Whenever I fell for a guy, he's always falling for another girl.

Whenever I'm falling for that guy and he's into me too, then later he has to leave me.

What is wrong with me?

After everything that has happened to for the past two months,

I don't really smile that much anymore.

I start to lock myself in my room.

And I stopped taking my medications.

What's the use for me to continue eating my meds, if i'm still hurt?

So, I'll just leave everything to God and let Him decide.

.....

2010-01-04T20:18:00.004+08:00

You really think I'm using you, huh? All this while, everything was alright between us. You know me very well. You know that I've never done anything bad to you or your brother. I've never had any of that kind of intentions towards you. You have been there for me. Why would you think that I'm using you? And worst still, you believe them. The ones that almost killed me. I know you're confused right now, and I don't blame you for that. There's a lot that already happened in your life. But still, it's unreasonable for you to be thinking that way. Amirul, you're 19. I'm sure you know how to differeniate which is right, and which is wrong. You know me well, and you know that I wouldn't and would NEVER use you. Think for yourself. About that argument earlier, I don't blame you for that. But I blame those who pretended to be my bestfriend. I just hope that you think carefully about what I said. I don't want to fight with you, cause I know, you mean something to me.

2010-01-04T19:48:00.002+08:00

WTF.

Hope you have a great life ahead.

Peace out.

I'm dying inside but I won't cry for help for I know you won't be there,

all this time you didn't care.

2009-12-31T12:15:00.001+08:00

Awwwwww.. So cute :D

2009-12-30T17:35:00.002+08:00

To Deeyana, Shakinah & all other girls who's going through a hard time:

"Of course, you're going to get your heart broken. And it isn't just going to happen once, but a lot. That's just part of growing up, and it makes you stronger. Then you can handle it better next time. You may not get through it yourself, but your friends will help you through it. And you'll be a stronger person because of it. Then one day someone will come along, and it'll all pay off and no one will ever break your heart again."

So cheer up, and keep thinking positive. There are better things that awaits us in the future :)

2009-12-23T12:01:00.001+08:00

"Letting go, even if it hurts, doesn't mean you have to let go of everything.

You just have to let go of the person and your feelings for her/him

But the memories will always be there whether it's good or bad.

Because everytime you remember those memories,

it will always put a smile into your heart.

And be glad that once in your life this person made you happy and put colors into your life

even if it's just for a while."

2009-12-23T10:42:00.003+08:00

2009-12-22T10:45:00.002+08:00

"Everybody has difficult years, but a lot of times the difficult years end up being the greatest years of your whole entire life, if you survive them." -Brittany Murphy

1977-2009

Brittany Murphy- Faster Kill Pussycat

2009-12-20T22:11:00.002+08:00

i'm so sleepy.

meeting lisa tomorrow.

wish me luck.

i swear, i can't take this anymore.

it's like you're hurting me more, when i've been hurt enough.

2009-12-19T20:34:00.000+08:00

I.HATE.YOU

2009-12-18T21:44:00.002+08:00

Whenever I day dream,

and day dream I do,

in my secret garden,

I day dream of you.

I day dream of you,

in a faraway land;

embracing me tight

and holding my hand.

Holding my hand,

and touching my face.

Just you and me,

in this peaceful place.

In this peaceful place

a pristine river flows.

Where the unicorns run,

a breeze always blows.

A breeze always blows

and sings of a song;

our love in a place

where you're never gone.

Where you're never gone

is as it would seem,

from dusk until dawn,

whenever I day dream.

And whenever I day dream,

and day dream I do,

in my secret garden,

I day dream of you.

now, i'm gonna call that day dream, a nightmare.

2009-12-18T19:36:00.002+08:00

I miss these three girls above (:

Just realise something in the picture.

Deeyana, me & Shakinah have a black rubber bandn on our wrist each.

Okay, I'm just being random =.="

I miss Nurul Amanina Binte Aziz :O

2009-12-17T17:14:00.004+08:00

Rahmatullah Bin Ahmad
11 August 1993-17 December 2009

You were there for me.

You had to bear with all my crap.

You keep on loving me, even though you know that my heart's not with you.

You made me laugh, smile, cry, angry and all other emotions.

You saved me when I'm in danger.

You find cure for me when I'm in pain.

You'd wipe my tears away for me.

You got your heart broken plenty of times, because of me.

Even though I've been bruised and slashed at the back when I'm with you, I know you'd keep me safe.

When I'm with the bad guys, I knew you'd come and save me.

& I was right. You did.

You sacrificed a lot for me.
Yet, me being the ungrateful one, still didn't thank God for sending a great/wonderful guy to me .

And now that you're gone, I realise there's no use for me to regret.

I had my chance, but I blew it away.

With all my tears streaming down my face now, I know you'd never come back.

There's no one to wipe away these tears for me.

Though I'm not in love with you, we definitely connected.

I'm sorry for all the wrong things I had done to you.

I'm sorry for not being the person you wanted me to.

I'm sorry for not loving you the way you wanted me to.

I'm sorry for everything.

You'll never be forgotten. I promise.

I believe, Allah loves you more.

He knows better.

2009-12-14T22:01:00.003+08:00

I'm so tired, and I'm so lazy to blog. Probably will be closing my blog soon :)
Anyways, I still haven't purchase my school books yet. So I just found out that next year Sec 4 NA will be splitting into three classes. 403, 404 & 405. I still want to remain in 403. There's so many memories there :(
Time is fast. Say hello to 2010. My New Year resolutions will be:

Be a better person
Concentrate on my studies/ Study harder
Try to forget that someone, which I've been tryin for the past years =.=
Stop being lazy
Decrease my sleeping time

Can manage? I hope so. That's why it's called Resolutions. I can't wait for school to open. But then again, I haven't even touch my holiday assignments. Aiyooooo~

I am so confused with you.

2009-12-10T19:24:00.003+08:00

"If you look inside a girl, you would see how much she really cries. You would find so many secrets and lots of lies. But what'll you see the most is how hard it is to stay strong when nothing is right and everything is wrong."

2009-12-08T11:16:00.001+08:00

Official Last Song's Poster.

Miley meets the Queen.

2009-12-07T11:51:00.003+08:00

Go to Deeyana's blog and look at our Primary school picture. Try to find me & her. Trust me, it's not easy.

Deeyana, I'm promoting your blog.

.....

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY,

ASYRAF ISKANDAR!

Finally, you've turned 15.

Semoga panjang umur dan dimurahkan rezeki.

Amin.

Thanks for helping me for the past few months :P

Help me again, okay? You promised to.

Stay happy :)

2009-12-06T15:46:00.002+08:00

I want someone to love me, for who I am.

I want someone to need me, is that so bad.

I'm shaking of all the pain.

You break my heart once again.

& I'm frightened that I couldn't be strong.

2009-12-04T18:34:00.002+08:00

Ever wonder why we have to live in this world when we're always feeling down most of time? Why you frown more than you smile? Why you cry more than you laugh? When you feel like it's already the end but actually it's just a start of something new? Challenges come without inviting. That's why we always have to be prepared for the worse. And sometimes I wonder than sometimes there's no point in thinking positive, cause when we're already positive about something, it wouldn't happen the way we want it to.

Sighs.

i miss seeing everyone in school uniform :(

2009-12-01T10:02:00.000+08:00

We Belong to Music - Timbaland ft. Miley Cyrus

2009-11-30T17:51:00.002+08:00

SWEET NIBBLETS!

SAY WHAT?!

YA THINK?!

2009-11-28T12:31:00.003+08:00

It hurts being with someone you don't love.

But it hurts more waiting for that person you love.

2009-11-25T19:01:00.005+08:00

"There is this girl. She used to have a crush on this boy. But not anymore. She dosen't have a crush on him anymore because she already fell in love with him. She waited for him, but he never come. She cried almost every night, wondering if she could have a chance to be with him. He meant everything to her. Every second, minute, hour, day,month and year, he is all she thinks about. Nothing else. It's really saddening when he knows that she likes him, but he somehow ignore her. She got her heart broken couple of times, and she's still enduring the pain till now. She felt horrible, cause she adore someone who ignore her, but ignore those who adore her. She loved him so much that she ignore those wonderful guys who wanted her. Then one day, she gave up. She know she would never be with the guy that she really loves, so she gave him up. She got together with another guy, who really loves her and understands her. Though she's with another guy, she never forget and still loves the first guy. Because she knows that she would never get over him. Till now, she's still hoping for that ignorant guy, even after all the heartache she felt. All she want from him now is him telling her himself that he doesn't feel the same way for her. That's all she asks for, so that she can be happy with the guy she's with now."

****

The story above is EXACTLY the story of my life right now. It's really so complicated right now. In times like this, I want to thank my Girls - Deeyana, Raudhah, Shakinah - for giving me advices and helping me through, even if you girls are each having a difficult time yourself. Not forgetting Abang Mirul and Mat♥ for protecting me. Reihana, you always turn my frown upside down by cracking me up with your jokes. And Huda, for always reminding me of the old times that we share when were younger last time (Btw, All The Best for your PSLE results tomorrow. I know you can do it!). Thank you so much :)

Tomorrow will be my busy day. Probably staying at Granda's place the whole day to help her out for this Friday's Hari Raya Haji.

****

"You can love more than one your life, but there is only one love of your life."

-Miley Cyrus.

2009-11-24T10:05:00.003+08:00

Miley say's that she hope to be like Beyonce in the future.
I say I hope to be like Deeyana in the future.
How does that sounds?
:)

ps: i miss my bestie(s) :'(

2009-11-23T18:37:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY TO

MILEY RAY CYRUS !

231109

Finally, she's turned 17.

2009-11-20T17:52:00.003+08:00

The saddest thing is when you're feeling really down,

you look around and realise that there's no shouder for you

to cry on.

Sometimes it's better to let all your tears down,

rather than to keep everything inside.

:'(

2009-11-18T08:50:00.002+08:00

The official movie trailer for The Last Song:) Yeah, Miley's in it. Prolly will be releasng around April/May next year. Yeah, still a long time to go.

2009-11-17T18:46:00.002+08:00

Nick's upcoming single - Who I am.

Coming from his upcoming solo album :D

studied the whole night last night for my paper today. after that, talked on the phone with raudhah around 12+ am, then went to bed.

have to be in school by 0645am, but woke up late. anyways, performance today was GREAT. but unfortunately, i keep wanting to fall on stage. my hands were shaking. other than that, everything went on smoothly. after that, all performers were supposed to go back to the hall for photo taking. i felt like a celebrity at that point of time :)

anyways, had my re-test after that and it was a lil' difficult. the middle of the paper, i shed a few tears cause i suddenly lose my confidence :(

anyway, meeting up with clique tomorrow for our movie date. aku harap dyr ikut lah !

^.^